Grilled Onion Turkey Anti-Burger

It's that time again. TURKEY TIME. No seriously, though. You all know my theory that you can literally substitute ground turkey for ANYTHING that calls for ground beef, chicken, or pork. This recipe is no exception. I love a good hamburger. A big, greasy, covered-in-sauce-hamburger. I'm a man. A gay man, yes I know, shocker. But I still love the idea of a hamburger being a representation of masculinity. Well, leave it to me to gay it up with ground turkey.

I have literally spent the last 3 hours wrapping Christmas gifts. Or...Holiday gifts....or, as my corporate office refers to it, "STARFEST". Starfest. Fucking Starfest. We can't say 'Holiday' anymore? Really? We can't say Christmas? Soon, we will just refer to it as, 'December'. "Hey, have you bought your December presents yet? Are you going to the December party on Saturday?" How magical! Nothing says December like a December Tree! Why can't we just come to an agreement of religious holidays. Like, someone reshape the menorah into a Christmas tree - we can keep the candles! Fuck, we'll keep them. We will all wear one of those...stylish?...Kwanza hats in ravishing yellow, green, and burnt orange. Who am I leaving out? Who have I yet to offend? But in all seriousness...I really want to say that people need to chill the fuck out when it comes to religion - specifically around Christmas. I'm absolutely spiritual. But respecting other religions is just as important as respecting your own. We have the right to practice and worship religion in any way we see fit in America - I mean, look at TLC's primetime line-up. 'Muslims in America'. '19kids and Counting'. 'Sister Wives'. 'Toddlers and Tiaras'. All shows that display what it's like to have different beliefs and ways of living our lives - and they have to be legit, right? I mean, they're on TV. Not just TV, TLC. That's like saying being on E! makes you a celebrity.

I've gone off - but I think it's necessary for us to step back, take a deep breath, acknowledge that people may not agree with your religious views just as you may not believe in theirs. Use the word Chistmas. Use the word Hanukkah. Use the word Kwanza. Stop generalizing religion as 'Holiday' or worse, 'STARFEST'.

Which brings me to my 3 hours of wrapping presents - to clarify, Christmas presents. It's probably my favorite time of the holidays. I just love giving gifts. Whether it's new Sperry, oversized chambray shirt-dresses, ceramic antler jewelry holders or Home Depot giftcards, I love giving gifts. Gifts are meant to surprise and delight. So often we forget that part of Christmas is just being around those you love. That's where I tie in this week's dish, Grilled Onion Turkey Anti-Burger. I was absolutely famished by the end of wrapping presents, so I decided to whip up some turkey burgers. Nice and hearty for this time of the year in Texas when it's half cold/half luke-warm. I had invited a friend over, but she wanted to be alone...which makes total sense? So I invited my back-up friend who came over and I prepared this fabulous dinner while we chatted about our week and plans for the December Day!

What makes these turkey burgers particularly exciting is the addition of grilled onions, the honey-mustard salad, and the simple seasoning on the lean turkey meat. Juicy. Flavorful. The use of yellow mustard and honey mustard is a sweet and tangy twist you will love. In addition, the 100 calorie wheat sandwich thin buns take the bulk out of traditional hamburger buns (and are healthier, too). Fabulous burgers you'll make in the dead of winter - or the dead heat of the summer. Cookouts, watch out!

Grilled Onion Turkey Anti-Burger

1 white onion - sliced

1 bunch organic romaine hearts

1 pound lean ground turkey

yellow mustard

honey mustard dressing

olive oil

sea salt and freshly ground pepper

dill pickle slices

parmesan cheese
100 calorie 100% whole wheat sandwich thin buns

Makes four burgers. Preheat grill or grill pan to medium high heat. Begin by skinning the whole onion and slicing to where you have whole rings of onion. It's ideal if the stick together in a 'disc-like' fashion. Brush lightly with olive oil and season with sea salt and freshly ground pepper. (Seasoning is always to your liking; season as heavy or light as you like.) Place on the heated grill pan and cook for 8 minutes and flip and cook additional 8 minutes. (Onions may become so flaccid that they fall apart, that's okay.) While the onions are cooking, prepare your meat. Your turkey meat. Split the pound of meat into four balls and flatten with your hand to make a traditional patty shape. Brush with olive oil and season with freshly ground pepper and salt. Once your onions are cooked through and translucent, remove from pan and set aside. Begin cooking the turkey patties to the cooking directions on your meat package. While your patties are cooking, begin preparing your salad. Chop the romaine hearts into bite-sized pieces and lightly dress with honey mustard. Toast each side of the bun either in the oven on broil or in a toaster. Once the burger patties are cooked. It's time to assemble. First, the bottom bun, then the pickles, yellow mustard, salad, burger patty, grilled onions and finally a sprinkle of parmesan cheese. Place the top bun on and there you have it.

I've purposely left off measurements because it's up to your taste. Like salt? Use more. Love pepper? Use more pepper. 

Enjoy!